Even to a witch who is dedicated to Lord Anubis, who is associated with death, death is very hard. I had to deal with death yesterday when we put down my fur sister Trini Belle. We didn’t plan to put her down. I saw her barking as if she was barking in her sleep and when I tried to wake her up, she didn’t. And when I picked her up, she was still breathing and but her eyes were glassy and she was limp. My father and I ended up taking her to the vet. On the way there I kept asking Lord Anubis for us to not have to put her down and for me not to be selfish. I knew though, after seeing the doctor that we had to put her down. I knew that I couldn’t be selfish because if I was she wouldn’t have a quality life. I don’t often cry, but I was cried very hard yesterday. Little dogs go quicker than big ones and it took maybe 5-10 seconds for her to be put down.
Trini came into this life in a bad situation. She was abused in her first two years of life. When we got her it took her a year to warm up to my dad and when she finally did, she would sleep in his armpit. Even afterward, if she was blinded by the sun and didn’t know it was him, he would have to speak to her or she would bark. We got her from a Small Breed Rescue in Kentucky. This was the same place where we got my fur children. There are so many things that I am going to miss about her and the pain is not going to fade for a long while. However, I think she is with the other fur sisters and children who have been put down. A flash appeared in my mind of Shadow, my oldest dog that we put down in SC, and it comforted me. I think she is safe with Shadow and the others.
Death is very hard. The animals in my life are more than animals. They are my family and it was a very hard day yesterday and will continue to be hard for me. I hope none of you have to put down an animal you love.
Always and forever Trini Belle. One day I will see you. It will be a long time for me, but like a flash for you. Be happy till then and always know that we loved you and still love you.